In which I am an idiot

I’ve been peeing a lot more than usual, which is good. On the negative side of Things That Enter and Exit From That Region, I also have to use progesterone suppositories three times a day. A side effect of which is some rather unpleasant leakage. So I’ve established a close personal relationship with panty* liners. Unfortunately, I ran OUT of panty liners the other day, and haven’t had a chance to go buy more. In the meantime, I’ve been wrapping my underwear with toilet paper that I swap out a few times a day (yes, just like you did in middle school when you got your period for the first time). I do my best to keep things classy around here.

Mid-morning today I went to the bathroom at work. I entered the stall, pulled down my pants and underwear, and burst into tears. There was a beigeish, reddish stain on my underpants. It’s a good thing no one was in the bathroom with me, because I sobbed hysterically for a full 90 seconds before realizing the (white) toilet paper had ripped down the center, exposing my (beigeish, reddish) underpants underneath. Friends, there was no blood. It was my underpants, moistened by the progesterone ooze. I am now officially only wearing white underpants (the better to analyze the color of discharge) until I am AT LEAST in my second trimester. If I make it that far.

*Is there a more upsetting word than “panties”? I think not.


My scan today went perfectly.


One gestational sac, located in the uterus (rather than a fallopian tube, for which the embryo would be SO GROUNDED. Next scan is on the 11th. I will endeavor to make it there with some shred of my sanity intact. Wearing white underwear.

5 thoughts on “In which I am an idiot

  1. these progesterone suppositories are the worst! I honestly would rather do 5 injections a day over this stuff. And yes, lm living by panty liners, too!

    Sorry you had a freak out! It’s so so normal at this time! Im freakin constantly!

    Beautiful scan! How far along are you? Have you heard the HR?

    • I’m 5 weeks, 1 day today. Too early for a heartbeat, but that’s what we’ll see (hopefully!) on the 11th. I wish both of us could stop freaking out!! It is the worst feeling.

  2. Oh goodness! I’m following you know! I love reading your posts. You are so comical. I know what you’re saying about the value of white underpants. Red is my favorite color, but it causes too much concern down there. P.S. What is with the booties they made us wear? My hubby had to wear them too and with the size of his feet, he didn’t think it would work, but (amazingly) they did! They look a bit elven (elf-like), don’t you think?

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